once a bitch, always a bitch.

when i was a kid, people call me non.

 

when i grew up, people started calling me jawe.

 

when i was 14, i ask people to call helena.

 

when i was 18, i let people call me jawe.

 

when i was 19, i rename myself to gina.

 

when i am 20, i ask people to call me jawa.

 

 

 

non is my late-brother version of nur.

 

jawe is the easier way to say jawahir.

 

helena is the name for rebellious me.

 

jawe again is the short name for orientation week.

 

gina is the name a friend gave me.

 

jawa is the chinese version of jawe.

 

 

 

you can call me anything you want,

 

but please don't call me nur.

 

i want to reserve that for my future (second) husband.

 

 

 

enough for now.

 

i want to go and die.

 

 

 

p/s: don't call me the romantic-type, 'coz i'm not.